6/01/2010

Last night I was invited to a volleyball game. To play sand volleyball... at a bar. Little did I know when I arrived, my friend was there with her girlfriend. I walked by. Didn't see them anywhere. There was no sand volleyball. I left after making eye contact with her and noticed her girlfriend was a bit peaved. They were sitting at the bar. Feeling uncomfortable I left. Not at the fact that she was with her girlfriend but me appearing just made things complicated. I've had a "crush" on this girl for about 3 years now, a friendly crush. I could never actually see myself with another woman- sexaually. It just wouldn't happen (unless there were drugs involved). The feeling, idea, and entire process of the night sank in as I started driving home. I had left my granmother sitting at home to hang out with this girl. I was mad at myself but at the same time felt it was something I had to overcome in myself. Family can hold us back from success... thats what I hear. Thats what they say. Is it true? Was my experience worth it? If it led me to the cure of all illness then yes, it was worth it.